Simchat Torah nemesis: lemon meringue pie

Where do I begin? So much has happened in the span of 25 hours, that I don't even know the best place to start.

I guess I'll start with pre-Simchat Torah preparations.

Yom Tov was rapidly approaching and I had spent the entire day cooking, preparing, moving furniture and cleaning. With Buggy at work all day long, I had work extra hard because I was by myself. So, I got things going by moving around the furniture. With two heavy couches, a glass dining table, about 9 chairs and two coffee tables, it was no easy feat. But, I managed just fine and was able to clean this huge space in the center of the room. I hit the two coffee tables underneath Buggy's foosball table and the dining room table, and then got to work on the floor.

Check out my handywork:





Nemesis #1: Sponga
I am NOT a fan of the sponga stick. I find it clumsily and sloppy to use. Constantly wringing out this rag (called blatot) that is filthy because its been on the floor, in a bucket and then trying to wipe the floor with it is extremely uncomfortable for me. But, I made such a mess of the kitchen floor that it was necessary. Fortunately, I was dressed well for the occassion and managed to get the house in presentable shape for our company. I've been praying for a good ol's sponge mop ever since erev Chag. Buggy said it's impossible to find one, so I'm on a new mission.

Moving on...

I cut and prepared the three salads, and decided at the last minute to make a mandarin orange salad as opposed to the terra chip salad, and mainly because I don't remember how to make the latter's dressing so it was just easier for me to do. Good thing I did the switch - but more on that later.

Anyway, by the time Buggy got home, I was knee deep in dessert preparations and the house and tables were all set for our guests. We had little time to get showered and dressed, and Rachel and Oren will still on their way from Tel Aviv, so we stepped things up and really got moving. I was dressed and ready to go, with my wig firmly in place, when Buggy called Oren to find out how far away they were. We wanted to take a cab before Yom Tov to Buggy's parents in Talbieh so we could say goodbye to their Succah (a Buggy family tradition that includes copious amounts of good quality scotch) and then walk down the block to Chovevei for Mincha and Hakafot. But, El Jeffe was driving Oren and Rachel and soon I had no choice but to light candles as they still hadn't arrived. Needless to say, I was unhappy that we had to do the walk for three reasons:

1) Buggy had to go by himself ahead to shul so he wouldn't miss Mincha and we were hoping to usher in the Chag together.
2) I had been on my feet the entire day, and they were serious hurting me from all that moving and standing, that the 25 minute walk UPHILL was going to really get my dogs barking
3) I baked 4 tins of brownies for my MIL's big Simchat Torah open house kiddush and to do the walk AND shlept that much baked goods was going to be heavy

Well, when Oren and Rachel got here I basically blew up at them but NOT at them. All I asked was "whose fault was it that they were late, so I can blame the right person". Fortunately, it was someone else in the car and neither my guests not El Jeffe who was the cause for their lateness. I don't like him ANYWAY, so that made me feel much better and I channeled all my energy elsewhere.

The walk up to Talbieh was sweaty and I was cursing myself for wearing a heavy shirt. I dropped Oren and Rachel off at Ohel Nechama, told them what time dinner was, and made my way to my in-laws. Fortunately, my MIL was getting ready for the Kiddush so I was able to drop off the brownies and mop off some of the sweat before going down the block to shul.

And, wouldn't you know it, but as I got closer to shul I ran into someone I haven't seen since graduation from High School. I could pick this girl out of the Darkness plague - as long as she's speaking. She has one of those unmistakeable voices. In hindsight, I should have just walked on by but I decided to stop and say something. And the following 5 minutes I will never be able to get back in my life, as we had the dumbess conversation on earth.

She said: "OMG, I didn't recognize you at all. Did you have, like, curly hair in high school"
Me: "Umm, some days I did. I guess it must be the wig"
She said: "Umm, yeah, must be. I also, like, haven't seen you since high school."
PAUSE
Me: "OK"
She said: "Do you live here?"
Me: "Yeah, near by"
She said: "Nice. We're here for the holiday. These are my kids"
Proceeds to point out her children by name. Goes over my head.
Me: "Nice. Well, ok. Good to see you. Enjoy"
She said: "Oh yeah, you too, see ya!"

I didn't really like her in High School, so I guess this conversation wasn't surprising. She had the flattest stomach - after 3 children - that I've ever seen. Bitch.

So, Hakafot were typically for a woman. I.e., absolutely boring. I found some of our dinner guests and caught up with them, then went into shul to catch Buggy with his hakafah and to say hello to some of his family members, and then it was back to Baka for dinner. We ran into Hannah and Shana, which was great, as they were sure to get lost getting to our apartment.

And dinner was GREAT! It was so fantastic, I am really happy with how everything went and it made my filthy floor worthwhile. We had 14 in the end as my friend Lana couldn't make it and Buggy's cousin Gideon bailed last minute. It was a nice group, 3 friends from America, El Jeffe and his amazingly sweet, nice brother who just made Aliyah, Rachel and Oren, Nechama and Julia and Dani Shai (Buggy's friend from childhood) from Tel Aviv, Sean and Ricky from Jerusalem (also Buggy's friends). The group really interacted well, everyone mingled and what began as pockets of people eating scattered throughout the apartment ended with everyone in a big circle for dessert. That was the best part - everyone just naturally evolved into the big circle at the end. It made me feel good that everyone enjoyed themselves and, I will admit, the cooking compliments were great. When everyone left to hit the Jerusalem Simchat Torah parties, Buggy and I cleaned up as best we could and then I left the dishes to soak in the sink and we passed out.

The following morning, when Oren got up I was washing dishes at the sink. I got Buggy up for the 7:15 minyan and he made it there in record time. We had given Oren the keys since him and Rachel went out to visit friends in the neighborhood after dinner and he told us that he had a really hard time trying to open the gate. So much so, that he ended up just scaling the fence and opening the door from the inside.

Talk about crack pot security. Buggy and I will need to discuss another security measure with my folks after they finish their 3 day holiday.

So, Oren left to go to shul and Rachel and I took our time getting ready. My in-law's open house wasn't going to start until after Noon so we didn't leave here until 11:30. We got to the house right before Buggy and Oren were finished, so we went down the block to pick them up from shul. And boy, when my in-law's warned that it was a HUGE kiddish they weren't kidding. We estimated at least 250-275 people came in and out of the house. We couldn't find places to sit and at one point, we lost Rachel and Oren.

Buggy told me to go wash and so we both went into the house and washed, only to discover that there really wasn't any bread. Except, the caterers had made these smoked salmon sandwhiches, so Buggy and I went towards the table laden with food and surrounded by people 3 rows deep and tried to get a sandwhich to make Hamotzei.

Just as we got to the front of the table, this woman scooped up the last 4 sandwhiches and left us with NOTHING! Fortunately, a piece of bread was the garnish for the sandwhiches and we were able to make Hamotzei. Buggy was not pleased though, and was apalled at how rude this woman was especially since there were other people at the meal. Nevertheless, there were plenty of sandwhiches inside the house so Buggy was able to get his fill and since I don't like smoked salmon anyway, I was content with the bread garnish.

Meanwhile, there were TONS of Tel Avivians who came to the kiddish. Since it was an open house, I won't say that they crashed, but I can tell you that they certainly weren't invited. There was one girl there that Buggy went on a date with and, had she known that it was his parents house, I assure you she wouldn't have come to the Kiddish. Let's just say it wasn't the best date he went on and she didn't treat him nicely.

Buggy was enjoying the anonymity of some of the people at the Kiddish, and he got plenty of Mazal Tov's from all of his parent's friends. A lot of the family members - including extended folks from the States who were in town for chag - were at the kiddish and it was very nice to see everyone. I think everyone had a great time and the food was good. People also really liked my brownies, which was nice to hear.



Nemesis #2: petit-four mini lemon meringue pie
OMG, the caterer made these mini lemon meringue pies that were INCREDIBLE! You'll understand why these were my nemesis in a minute. Well, I ended up not eating much food. I'm not such a fan of crowded kiddush eats but since I wasn't making lunch, I had to chow down. Anyway, I had a spoonfull of chickpea chulent and 1 piece of potato kugel before I hit the petit-fours. I could go days eating nothing but baked goods, and I've got the hips to prove it too! Needless to say, as soon as I got my lips around these lemon meringue pies I was in absolute heaven! And then, after downing about 3, I couldn't find anymore. Fortunately, I knew the hosts and was able to sneak into the kitchen to find the reserves. I brought back 1 for Rachel to taste (she didn't like it! Can you believe it????) and then scarfed down a few more. I rationalized that we did a lot of uphill walking so it was ok to indulge.

As the crowd thinned, we helped clean up a bit and then Oren, Rachel, me and Buggy met up with El Jeffe and walked back towards Baka. We walked a new way and ended up on Yael street right by the shul that Buggy calls the "comfy chair shul". Fortunately, they had some of the rows of comfy chairs outside the locked shul and we all took a load off. Buggy was right, the chairs ARE amazing and so we're thinking about going to that shul tonight for davening.

We got home, took something to drink, and then slept the Chag away. After Rachel and Oren left, Buggy settled in for some work and I got the sponga bucket back out. With Buggy hard at work, I set to undo what I had done erev chag and tried to put everything back into place. It was hard but little by little, I got everything done. And, I spongaed the floors again in almost every room and so now everything gleams. Just as I was about to sponga the succah, a band started playing and it was LOUD!

Buggy immediately got on the phone with his friend Chanan, who manages all of the community centers in Baka and Talbieh, and his wife told us that the community center next door to our apartment will have an outdoor live band for second Hakafot for 2 hours. He was not happy but I was thrilled! I was able to clean to some great Hebrew music. Although, to be honest, the Arctic Monkeys would have been my first choice. But, I was so excited that they did this next door to the apartment, that I called my parents house in the States (they aren away for the Chag) and left them a message that they would be able to come to Israel for Chag and have 2nd Hakafot right next door! It was exciting, and made me a little homesick, but working always helps with the hurt.

Anyway, I was so wiped by the time I finished cleaning and doing two loads of sheet and tablecloth laundry, that I collapsed on the couch. I was feeling really sick so Buggy helped me to bed and we were out in seconds.

Today, I am doing absolutely nothing. I might take off the Succah decorations so Buggy can dismantle the Succah over the weekend. But, we have so much leftovers that I am not cooking a thing! Instead, I am going to divide and warm up and we're going to just make it on leftovers.

We both weighed ourselves this morning and I gained 2 pounds in 1 day! Buggy's numbers were similar and so I packed up ALL of the desserts we have left over from Chag and I sent them off to Buggy's office. Let them all pig out on chocolate cake and chocolate chip cookie bars. The holidays are over and folks, we are on diets!

Shabbat Shalom to all!

Juke II

Yesterday was one of the most exhausting days I've had in a long, long time. Let me start from the very beginning. So, as usual, I am not sleeping very well. On Monday night, I spent hours tossing and turning in bed. Finally, at 4:30 a.m., I fell asleep. My phone started ringing at 10:00 a.m. and I managed to pull myself out of bed by 10:30 a.m.

So, rememeber the post when I mentioned that the post office is no longer open regular business hours. I guess I should have understood that to also mean that lines are going to be insanely long! After I downed a quick breakfast of 5% cottage cheese and 39 calories-apiece "toasting", I strapped on my New Balances and walked to the post office. It's also, not sure I've mentioned, stinking hot in Tel Aviv! The humidity is a killer people, I feel like I'm walking in the midst of a Russian bath.

Anyway, I got to the post office in decent time and the line was OUT THE DOOR! I couldn't even get inside the building. And all I needed to mail was the text of the Ketubah to my friend Eta's father, who is making us a beautiful version for the wedding.

2 hours later, my turn finally came, and I went up to the postal worker and asked her how much it would cost to have the letter get to the States by Friday. She told me 58 shekel! That's a ridiculous amount of money, for one tiny little letter. Well, I spent a little less for it to go "expess" and I hope it gets there within the week. Oh, and did I mention that once I got into the post office the AC wasn't working well. I was better off outside in the shade, at least there's a bit of a breeze in the shade.

So, after my post office experience, I had to walk all the way to Gordon/Dizengoff to pick up some perscription eye drops. While I was there, I called my friend Rachel to see if she wanted to meet at Dizi for coffee. I love that place, it's a coffee shop/laundromat/video rental store in one. You can also rent laptops while you're in the cafe and the place is really, really nicely designed and clean. I've definitely blogged about this place before, but in case you're heading to Tel Aviv and want to check it out, Dizi is in Dizingoff Center, right across from the Rav Chen movie theater.

Rachel and I had a really, really nice chat over some ice coffee and mint/lemon ice tea (mine, it was terrific!). I don't remember the last time I had such a laugh, it was nice to get out of my own life for a bit and just enjoy talking about other things. After a few hours, I bid Rachel adieu and headed back to my apartment to continue packing.

So yesterday, I packed up all of my books, my comforter and a pillow (these boxes don't fit much folks) and a box of linens and glass items (i.e. vases (2), decanter, candles and candle stick holders, etc.). I also packed up the rest of my hanging items and just left out the items that I am taking back to the States with me. Since I have no idea when the closets are going to be delivered to the apartment, and there is a chance that I won't get it before I leave in 2 1/2 weeks, I wanted to at least make sure my clothes for home were in one place. Anyway, by this point I'm pretty tired, having walked a long time and been out in the heat. But, I was set to meet El Jeffe and Gayle for coffee after dinner to talk about Sheva Brachot.

My friends in Tel Aviv offered to make us Sheva Brachot on Wednesday night after the wedding, and I JUMPED at the chance! How great does a beach BBQ sound? El Jeffe could only join us for a bit because he had a date (I better get a full report later!!) and so Gayle and I quickly went over the logistics and I gave her the guest list with some phone numbers. We hung out some more and discussed Shabbos plans, and then I walked back to the apartment.

Buggy was already practically asleep in his apartment in Jerusalem, so I wished him good luck on his big, big test today, and then stopped off at the AM PM to pick up 5 bottles of Mei Eden. Since I have to move my own Mei Eden water cooler, I didn't want to start a new liter. I don't know how the heck the movers would move it with water attached! So, 5 bottles of water should get me and Buggy through Shabbos (I'm hoping!).

I got back to the apartment and hopped into the shower. I'm up to twice a day at this point, once in the morning and again before bed, because of this weather. It's like New York in August but for 6 months folks, it's just nasty. The only nice thing is that I'm getting tan and I don't even have to sit out on the beach for it! Just walking outdoors is browning my skin nicely.

After my shower, I forced myself to stay awake so that Mom could call me when she got home about the new response cards. I get so excited to hear about the people who are RSVPing to the wedding. Sadly, all of the response cards yesterday were regrets, but many came with very nice and appreciated checks!

So finally, I thought I was in the clear, and I got out of bed to hit the bathroom quickly before getting some much needed sleep. And, when I was in a bit of a compromising position, is when I spied the HUGE juke. It was just hanging out on my bathroom floor, inches away from my barefoot toes. And it was massive. I couldn't do anything about it at that point, and as soon as I washed my hands, the juke raced into my living room.

Now, when I was in High School, I once accidentally woke up to a new station instead of my beloved Z100. That morning, the interviewer on the news station was talking about Manhattan cockaroaches and how much they LOVED cardboard boxes. In fact, the roaches see cardboard and almost always drop a load of eggs (they love cardboard for breeding). I freaked because the juke ran into my apartment and headed straight towards my packing area. Well, the adrenaline was pumping now, there was no way I could just ignored the juke running loose amounts my boxes? I cannot risk letting it either lay some eggs of make himself comfortable in my box and then end up bringing the box with the juke to my new apartment.

So, I decided to try to kill it myself. I grabbed one of my New Balance sneakers, a broom, and a can of bathroom airfreshner. I figured if I could spray the juke with the air freshener, the chemicals might stun em and then I could smoosh him with my shoe.

It took me a few times to move bags and boxes to find the bugger, but when I finally did, my plan worked! I stunned em with the spray and then SMASH down with my sneaker. I then disposed of the carcas with three big, heavy, thick pieces of paper towels and wiped the area clean with an antibacterial cloth.

But, there was no way after that little episode, that I was going to be falling asleep anytime soon. I stayed up until 2:00 a.m., continued reading the same book I've been reading for the past 4 months, and finally calmed down enough to get some sleep. The 2 Advil helped too, it just relaxed my muscles and my aching knee, and I was able to get some sleep.

My alarm went off at 8:00 a.m. and I immediately called Buggy to wake him for his government exam. He was awake, which was good, so I didn't have to talk long and so I went back to sleep. I got a few more hours of rest and now I'm awake and locking myself into this apartment until I finish my story for Professor Kramer. Yonatan from my class is going to meet me for lunch tomorrow and, if I finish the paper in time, offered to bring it to Bar Ilan and drop it off in Professor Kramer's box. That would be really, really helpful for me so I'm hoping to take em up on the offer.

OK - time to stop procrastinating. I'm off to work on my paper.

Crave of the Day is the neighborhood ice cream truck! I miss the familiar jingle and the friendly man dispensing the soft ice cream swirls onto big cones or into cups. My favorite thing from those trucks are the Good Humor toasted almond ice cream sticks. I like those much better than the chocolate eclairs or the strawberry eclairs! Although, sometimes, you just want to have some fresh soft vanilla/chocolate swirl on a cone with rainbow sprinkles. Call me childish, but I've got some great ice cream memories from back in the day!

Gay Cowboys

Sorry for the title but I was strapped with an appropriate title for this post and then, on my HOT cable, came a commercial for Brokeback Mountain. I've seen this movie already but Israeli's will get their opportunity to watch it on TV this coming Friday night. Oh well, I'm going to please g-d be entertaining again so I guess I'll miss the second viewing.

Its been quite a busy few days! I begged El Jeffe for a ride to Jerusalem on Tuesday afternoon and, true to form, I arrive at Buggy's parents house a few minutes before candlelighting. The ride was a lot of fun though, with Nechama, Rachel and Oren sharing the trek. I sat with Buggy's apple pie and low-fat cheese cake on my lap the entire way to Jerusalem, and was thrilled that at least El Jeffe kept the car cool enough so that it wouldn't spoil.

Shavuot night in Buggy's family is amazing! We got to his Aunt's house and she had three tables set up with bowls and platters full of anything you can image you would want to put into sushi! There were stacks of nori, platters of fresh salmon, bowls of sticky rice, caviar, wasabi, soy sauce, egg and tofu and this amazing spinach and sesame salad that was divine! Buggy and I polished off almost an entire platter of salmon by ourselves! I used some chopsticks and Buggy alternated between his fingers and a fork. We had such a good time then we were both stuffed by the time dessert came out. I asked for some tea and managed to get a bag called Hot Love, which is this amazing raspberry and vanilla flavored tea. I need to find this in Israel because it was so yummy, but it's made by a company called Pompadour and I've never seen that brand in Israel. Anyway, I was so exhausted from lack of sleep that I didn't join Buggy at any of the shiurim. I was a bit embarressed about it, but Buggy stayed up until the last shiur at 4:00 a.m. and said he learned enough for the both of us. Shavuot lunch was also really nice as we ate by family friends of my parents who were visiting their Rechavia apartment from Queens. After lunch, we both went to our own rooms and passed out. Next thing I knew, Yom Tov was over and Buggy and I were making our way to the Mall to run some errands. I felt a bit weird, celebrating only one day of Shavuot, but I quickly got over that when I booted up the Finale of Heroes. Well worth it!

Thursday was nice and hot in Jerusalem but I spent most of the day indoors as Buggy had to work. Then, around 6:00 p.m., we headed back to Tel Aviv to catch Bracha and Anat's performances at the Tel Aviv Museaum. They were absolutely incredible! Both were accompanied by the Holon orchestra on pieces by Mendelsohn and Bach and then Bracha and Anat closed off the night with an incredible solo duo. It was magical! Buggy and I had stars in our eyes as we left the museaum.

And then, Friday, is was back to Jerusalem for the weekend. We walked to the parking lot to pick up Buggy's car and I was drenched in sweat from the heat and humidity! I need to get some more flary skirts cause it's hot in pants these days! I was looking forward to a relaxing Shabbos and then the inevitable happened. And, when I say inevitable, I mean that I'm shocked it hasn't happened already!

Buggy's parents entertained and I was helping with the soup course. For some reason, someone put the extra dining room table chair directly behind my chair so it was difficult to maneuver. And, as I was bringing one of Buggy's parents guests her bowl of soup, I tripped on the chair and spilled the soup next to her arm! She got flustered and upended the kiddish cup of red wine. I was so embarresed and I felt awful, as if I had scalded her but fortunately I missed her. And, of course Buggy's Mom was using her white tablecloth. Well, I ran into the kitchen to get a paper napkin to mop up the spill and when I got back they were pouring seltzer over the stain, which miraculously lifted up and almost disappeared (but not quite as I wasn't that lucky).

I felt awful the entire night, even though Buggy tried to make me feel better about it. His parents and the other guests were really nice about it too, but I still felt really bad. I didn't sulk though, but I did spend the entire meal apologizing to this woman. I wouldn't have felt so bad but she made some comment that because of me, she was scared Buggy's parents wouldn't invite her back. It was a mean comment, she should have just let it go, but by saying what she did it just rubbed the whole thing in. Anyway, I told Buggy I no longer help when it comes to soup. I am good with the stuff that doesn't spill and stain - like bottles of closed soda and the salt.

Shabbat day was really nice, we ate by his brother's apartment in Katamon so at least we got in a bit of a walk and got to bond with the kids. It was really hot though and when we got back to his parents house, I was sweaty! We patted ourselves on the back for making it in the heat and then both went to sleep again. We do a lot of sleeping when we're at his parents place, and spend more time alone in separate beds then we do together! We both practically slept through Shabbos and then on Saturday night we went BACK to the Mall so that we could buy a birthday card and take out some money.

And that's when I found out about the invitations for the wedding. So, the people doing the invitations for us are really wonderful folk. So much so, that they offered to have their daughter bring the Israel and Europe invitations to Israel for us for free, as she was coming to the Holy Land for the Chag. Well, of course I was thrilled with her offer, and kept waiting to get the call to pick them up. The call came really early on friday morning, when she called to let us know that El Al lost her daughter's luggage and somehow the invitations went to Rome. Fortunately, they found our now Italian invites and they were delivered safe and sound to Ramat Beit Shemesh. Now, all Buggy and I have to do is make arrangements to go get them.

They could have been delivered to Eilat, I'm just so thrilled that they are in this Country and in one piece! I can't wait to see the invitations too, it will make the proximity of the wedding that much closer!

This morning, I met with my Kallah teacher for my very first Kallah lesson. It was a little unnerving meeting with her in a public restaurant in Jerusalem, but we really have no other choice in the matter. So, we met and spent almost two hours together! My Kallah teacher is a lovely French/Israeli woman who is married to a Rabbi in one of the Yishuvim. She is very sweet and her English was excellent, which was an initial concern of mine. Anyway, I was so flustered though about the topic that when I offered to pay for the bill and went to sign the check, I completely forgot to leave a tip! I am so embarressed, especially since we plan on meeting at this same location for the rest of my lessons! Hopefully, next time I'm in Jerusalem I'll be able to swing by and give the waitress a tip. She worked hard and didn't deserve the accidental shaft.

After the Kallah classes, I walked over to the El Al office and waited on the long line to convert my open ticket to a scheduled flight. They were pretty efficient and pretty soon I wasn't waiting for the El Al folks but for Buggy, who was stuck in traffic on King George street on his way to pick me up. We had a very quick lunch and then he dropped me off at the Tachanah with my huge knapsac. I told him that I wanted to walk from the Arlozorov bus station to my apartment and he warned me that my bag was too heavy. He said it was roughly the same weight as an Israeli Army radio and that I should be careful. Well, that just sounded like a big challenge for me and since I had equal distribution on the knapsac straps, I was excited about the prospect. I filled up my water bottle and got ready for the trek.

When I got the gate for the 480 bus, I saw the huge line and immediately joined the que. Well, I missed the 3:00 p.m. bus because it was too full but managed to be the fourth person in line for the next bus. I waited patiently with everyone on the line, sandwhiched between two sweaty and smelly gentelman but holding my breath so it wouldn't bother me. And then, out of nowhere, this woman with a shaitel and designer handbag tried to cut the line. Well, another woman on the line wasn't having it, so she started to yell at this woman to go to the back of the line. There are way too many times that this has happened to me, and so I was happy that this woman was making a statement. And boy were they going at it. The shaitel woman was screaming back that she could cut whenever she wanted to and no one could tell her what she could or could not do. Meanwhile, the shaitel woman had a daughter with her, a teenager with a pouchy tummy sucking on what looked like an iced lemonade. Well, next thing I know, the bus pulls up and suddenly this daughter had elbowed her way past ME and was pushing her way onto the bus. The woman screaming at the shaitel lady was saying she was going to go report her and the shaitel lady told her to go ahead. I looked up at the young girl, and watched as she smiled - she SMILED! - at her Mother and told her to just ignore the "crazy" woman and get on the bus. Well, I was now pretty pissed because this girl cut me in line. It was the principle of the matter! And what was worse was that she wore the garb of someone who is "frum" and acted like a complete pig.

I got my ticket and made my way to the back of the bus, taking a seat diagonal from the girl, who was waiting for her Mother to get on the bus.

I put my bag onto the seat and asked her: Are you dati?

She asked me why I wanted to know that information?

I said, you look dati based on the way you're dressed. And I asked her a second time.

Again, she asked me why I wanted to know.

So I told her that she should be absolutely ashamed as a religious girl that she acted in such a way. I told her that what she did was a terrible Chilul Hashem! And then I switched to English, because it's much easier for me to speak in English, and I just let it all come out. I said how disgusting her behavior was and how terrible it was that she did what she did with a big smile on her face.

I didn't talk long because I saw that nothing I said hit home, she still had that big assed smile on her face. It was so ugly, she was so ugly. I was so ashamed to be religious and, at that moment, was ashamed of this woman and her daughter. I wanted to tell this woman that she failed as a Mother, that she raised such a child without the basic Derech Eretz. I wanted to rip her shaitel off her head because it represents Tzinut and she acted in a manner that was not modest. But mostly, I wanted someone to come and force them off the bus because even in Israel there are rules in which you must abide by.

But instead, I pulled out my iPod and plugged myself in. I looked out the window at the beautiful scenery flanking Highway 1 and watched the green roll away as we headed towards Tel Aviv. And, once we got to the bus station, I walked all the way home carrying the 50+ pound knapsac. I arrived soaked through with sweat but feeling relaxed and refreshed, happy that I didn't keep my opinions inside to fester and that I told the girl how I felt.

I'm tired but I'm forcing myself to stay up because Office Space will be on TV in a few minutes. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day running some more Aliyah related errands. Namely, I have to go back to the Student Authority to hopefully get the signoff on my paper which will reimburse me for my tuition. Then, depending on the time, it's off to Macabi to have a chat with the Office Manager about how they've been stealing money from me for every single month since the day I signed up with them. Here's hoping I won't need a lawyer when I'm done.

Tomorrow is Memorial Day in the States and I hope everyone enjoys the Parade, supports our Troops still fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan, eats LOTS of BBQ and soaks up the sun either in Central Park or on the Beach in the Hamptons!

Strike Over!

The strike is finally over! That means, it's back to waking up at 7:00 a.m. on Wednesday mornings so that I can make it to class on time. I have no idea what the terms were, nor do I necessarily care, but if everyone is happy then good. Of course, extending the semester by an entire month doesn't make ME happy. In fact, at this rate, my Philosophy final will probably be scheduled for the day of the wedding. And, while I'm sure everyone really enjoyed the nice long break between Pesach and Shavuot, I was actually looking forward to NOT having to go to school in June/July so I could concentrate on other important things like wedding and moving.

Oh well, really nothing I can do about it so I'll just sit back and see what happens. Of course, now I actually have to go and do the reading for class on Wednesday. Oy.

Today was a quiet and semi-productive day. I cleaned out my fridge and did some light housekeeping, ran some pharmacy errands and then had a minor melt-down. Unfortunately for Mom, she once again bore the brunt of it. I'm tired people. Just really, really tired and last night I was so overtired that I didn't sleep. Not at all. When Buggy called me at 9:30 to wake me, I felt like I had just fallen asleep! I begged him to let me snooze a bit but the damage was done and I got up a few minutes later.

I needed a walk and since Tel Aviv is nice and hot but not humid (yet, you know this will be coming soon and with a vengence) so I left my apartment and started to amble. Only, I don't really know how to amble. Living in Manhattan kinda beats that out of you, and so I took off and somehow found myself in front of a salon. I looked at my greasy hair, pulled back into a tight ponytail, and decided why not? I deserve to do something nice for me...And I went in and got myself a blow out, or a Fan as they call it here in Israel. Yotam did a very nice job, even leaving some wave so that I have a little bounce to the strands, and I walked out feeling a little more human. I can't really do much about the bags under my eyes. Hopefully I'll have enough time to put on some makeup before Shavuot starts.

It's weird to me to be celebrating only one day of Shavuot. I don't think I'm staying up at all this year - I'm just way too sleep deprived to try that - but Buggy is going to pull the all nighter. He had already mapped out where shiurim he wants to go to and I keep dreaming about hitting the sheets and calling it a night. And, while all my friends and family will be spending the second day celebrating the Chag and gorging themselves on cheesecake, Buggy and I will have lots of errands to run.

El Jeffe just called to let me know that he's not coming to pick me up before 5:00 so I'm thinking that gives me plenty of time to get a quick nap in. It would be nice not to bite Buggy's head off out of exhaustion. Poor guy - sometimes I think he's a real Saint for sticking with me.

Chag Sameach! Good luck to all you lactose intolerant folks out there and Cousin Neil - this means you!! Don't forget the Lactaid pills!

At the Carwash...

These building in Bayit Vegan is what Buggy refers to as the eyesore of Jerusalem. I wish I had a picture of this during the day, these buildings are absolutely bizarre. And you can just imagine how much it costs to live in the row of connecting apartments up top. With the views of Jerusalem, I'm sure we're talking well over a million.

So, I spent majority of Thursday and Friday in the kitchen and running errands. I went to three different supermarkets looking for salsa so I could make the taco salad for El Jeffe's meal. Then, it was back to my apartment to grill the tuna for the tuna salad nicoise, roast the vegetables, steam the string beans, roast the potatoes, make the sesame teriyaki and barbecue chicken and make sure the apartment was clean and ready for Shabbat before Buggy came from Jerusalem. By the time Buggy finally walked through the door, I was pretty much done with everything and absolutely wiped. He was hungry so I told him to help himself to anything in the fridge. I went to my bedroom to put away some of the clothing that I had laid out on the bed and Buggy followed me, chomping on a pickle. I asked him where he got the pickle, and he told me the container on the top of my fridge. I grimaced. And told him that those were the pickles that fell on the floor that I never got around to throwing out. He looked at me like I had two heads and then started ticking down the food-related "issues" I've caused him since the beginning of our courtship.

First, it was the laxative chocolates. He forgave me for that because I ate them too and was sick right along with him. Then it was the whole wheat pasta, which I told him he's going to have to get used to cause I'm saying goodbye to white pasta. After that, it was the Fiber One chicken that apparently had him really sick to his stomach. And now, I was feeding him dirty pickles!

I explained that the pickles fell out of the fridge late one night and rather than leave them to rot and smell up my garbage, I put them back in the container and made a mental note to throw them out the following day. Umm, so I just forgot to throw them out.

Anyway, we watched some Harry Potter Goblet of Fire before it was time for Shabbat. The meal at El Jeffe's was so nice, it was just really great being able to talk to new people and drink with friends. Buggy walked me home and I was tettering on my flip-flops from all the Glenfiddich. The next day, I slept in and then Buggy came by for kiddish/lunch. It was the first time I've made a zucchini bread since the famous Zucchini Bread Incident of 1996, and I was really nervous. Buggy loved it! And, as he read some more of his book, I whistled a happy tune and made the tuna salad nicoise dressing. It was good except I dried out the tuna. Otherwise, I assembled everything so nicely, even Chef Rob would have been proud! We finished lunch and spent the rest of the day relaxing and reading. I did some reading for class next week and Buggy plowed through the rest of the newest Lord of the Rings novels.

Saturday night, we decided to go to Buggy's friends in Givat Zeev for Melavah Malka and a movie. Since I made so many apple cinnamon muffins (the low-calorie ones his nutritionist gave me the recipe for), I brought over 6 fresh ones and we took the Harry Potter movie. For some reason though, by the time we got there, I was absolutely exhausted. We ended up only staying for a few hours and watching half of the movie, because Buggy and I continued on to his parents house in Jerusalem.

We unpacked quickly, washed up, and then went to our separate bedrooms. Unfortunately, my bedroom came equipped with my very own mosquito! Man, these Jerusalem mosquito's are absolutely relentless. I padded into Buggy's bedroom to wake him up at 9:00 and show him all of my bites, but he begged me for a few more hours of sleep, and so I took his DVD player and watched the rest of Harry Potter.

Buggy left me for about an hour to attend his third Shiur Chatan - I still haven't started Kallah classes - and I just hung out and surfed the net. He picked me up around 1:00 and that's when the marathon of errands began. We went over to the Malcha Mall so Buggy could wash him car, and the dust in the air started to suffocate me. I was having some trouble breathing, so Buggy put the air on in the car and let me sit and breath while we went through the car wash. We went inside the mall and just ran a few errands, including getting Buggy a new wallet (his broke) and grabbing a bite to eat. Since Buggy has so much work due for school tomorrow, he dropped me off early at the Tachanah and I was able to get on the 4:30 p.m. bus back to Tel Aviv. Unfortunately for me, I had the Israeli version of a Big Gulp of Diet Coke at lunch and my bladder started hurting before we even hit the Ayalon highway.

We pulled into the Arlozorov station and I was doing the dance in my chair, desperate to get out and get moving...to the nearest bathroom. Unfortunately for me, my apartment is a good 40 minute walk from the Arlozorov bus station. I don't think I've ever done that walk as fast but somehow, I made it back to the apartment in time.

It's already 11:30 p.m. and I'm contemplating making the apple pie for Shavuot now. I'm excited about tomorrow, I have to do laundry desperately (I'm down to 1 pair of Granny panties) and I'm going to make Buggy a low-fat, low-calorie cheese cake for Shavuot. Also, my friend Bracha is in town and Buggy and I got tickets to her sold-out performance at the Tel Aviv Museaum on Thursday night! I cannot wait to see her! I haven;t seen her since before we got engaged, and she is such a brilliant violinist, I know the concert is going to be spectacular!

Song of the day is anything off of the Arctic Monkey's Favorite Worst Nightmare CD.

I'm Back

With an entire block full of these flowers blooming across the street from my Tel Aviv apartment, who wouldn't be thrilled to be back in the Holy Land? I for one am really looking forward to a vacation from my vacation. I certainly could use a little wedding break. Unfortunately, I'm delusion to think I'm actually going to be getting a break. But hey, one can dream, right?

A lot has gone on since last I've posted and there is too much to add to the blog so I'm just going to provide some highlights:

1) Had my very first gown fitting at Kleinfeld's on the 12th. It was pretty surreal to be wearing what will in a few months be my wedding gown. The manufacturer sent a muslin in white satin so it actually looked like the gown. My Mom asked me to give a little squeal at the next fitting so that the seamstress and my contact at Kleinfeld's gets just how happy and excited I am about the wedding. What can I say? I'm just not that girl. I'm happy though, really happy, just not squealing and jumping up and down happy. I don't express my emotions like that. Oh well, I'll try to fake it next time.

2) Somehow managed to take off from JFK during the Nor'easter. Granted, we sat on the tarmac for over 2 1/2 hours, which was torture to the already cramped and long 10 hour flight. But, Buggy picked me up at the airport, so knowing that the pain would be over in 12 hours kept me going.

3) A yeshiva bocher overzealous to grab his suitcase off of the conveyer belt caused a domino effect of seminary girls that ended with me practically on the bottom of the heap. I pulled a muscle trying to keep myself upright when the sem girls piled up on top of me. And then, to make matters worse, he didn't even apologized. Just stared at the ripple effect he caused with his oversized luggage. I guess that's what you get from this year's crop of Oreo cookies. Where's the mensch under that hat people??

4) Buggy and I were kvatar's at his (and soon to be mine) nephew's bris on Monday night. Armed with a bottle of Visine, I managed to keep myself awake and not drop the baby when I passed him along to Buggy. Thank g-d I caught a second wind, cause I was fading really fast between the drive from the airport to Jerusalem.

5) The writer's conference in Jerusalem was extremely disappointing. There are just too numerous reasons why, but I will discribe Wednesday morning's session. I raced from the Dr.'s office (oh yeah, I'm run down and sick so Buggy got me an appointment with his Dr. at the Wolfson medical center who perscribe lots of rest and fluids. I'll get back on my feet in no time folks!) to Beit Avichai (GORGEOUS building across the street from the Sheraton Hotel on King George) for the Noon conference. I made it in time and when I walked into the room, Professor Kramer was just about to begin the panel. Unfortunately, there was not an inch of space! I leaned against the front, praying that the wall would hold me up in the weakened condition, but more and more people kept pouring in! Soon, I couldn't even move my feet a milimeter as people (elderly, younger, middle aged, you name it) had copped a squat around my feet. Since I wasn't feeling well, I decided to make the executive decision to walk out and miss the panel. I heard that I missed a good one, but I just couldn't imagine spending an hour and a half in that situation. Hopefully I'll be able to catch next year's conference and attend like a lady.

So, those are the highlights leading up to this morning. I woke up at a fairly decent hour and got to work on the story that I have due on Tuesday. I have to say, I was having fun writing this morning! It was really just great to put my thoughts down and shape this story. I'm looking forward to seeing the outcome in a few days. Hopefully, I'll be able to comfortably meet my deadline.

I had to mail a thank you card to one of Buggy's parents friends and so I walked to the post office near Nordau. It is such a beautiful day here in Tel Aviv. Not an ounce of humidity in the air but plenty of sunshine and a cool, Spring breeze. I am enjoying this now cause I know what's to come - and it's coming soon. I'm not looking forward to the heat and humidity of Tel Aviv. Anyway, while at the post office I priced out cost to mail RSVP cards from Israel back to the States for Mom's wedding budget. Hopefully, it is reasonable amount based on the number of invitations we're sending out.

After the post office, I walked down Arlozorov to Supersol to do a major food shopping. I had nothing in my fridge when I got back from New York, so I needed to pick up food for myself and for me and Buggy this Shabbos. Since I had a lot of items, I asked for delivery, and only took the perishables home with me. When the delivery man came up, I had him offload all of the items in the hallway between my apartment and Itai's. Then, when he was done, he asked me for the delivery fee. Now, I was prepared to give him a bit of a tip, but when I turned back to get my purse, he told me I owed him 17 shekel for the delivery. Now peeps, I'm no dummy. I know that I already paid that amount at the supermarket, so I looked back at him and said that I had already paid. He insisted that I hadn't, and so I turned back to my purse to get the receipt. As I was turning back, he bent down and pocketed one of the spice jars I had bought. Now, I have no idea why he wanted to steal my spice jar (I think it was black pepper) but he was trying to steal 17 shekel too so I decided to let it go and get this man out of my apartment quickly. I showed him the fee that I had already paid and then handed him 4 shekel, which apparently insulted him because he left in a huff. Whatever, he can count the 20 shekel bottle of pepper into his tip.

Now I know I'm back in Israel, I'm back to the land where people try to take advantage of the American. That just put me in a foul mood.

But then, Jeff called and asked if we could do a big pot luck Friday night dinner.....in my apartment of course. Now, I had to cook anyway because Buggy was coming, so I said why not? We invited about 8 people, including Buggy and I, and have farmed out tasks to everyone. I'm in charge of making the kugels and rice, Jeff is making the meatballs and chicken, Gayle is bring the salad, Lana is bring the Challah and possibly the drinks and dessert is still left up in the air. I'm not baking since Buggy and I are on serious wedding lent and we don't need the cake in the house, but I did pick up some mango sorbet and was planning on getting fruit anyway. So, I am always the backup for dessert if need be. I'm actually looking forward to having Shabbat dinner in the apartment, it will be fun seeing everyone again.

OK, I'm off to finish cooking! Song of the day is Story by Brandi Carlisle, a great tune that I believe has been added to some sort of Grey's Anatomy montoge on YouTube. Check it out, it's a great tune!

Till tomorrow!

Sunday Mornings with Lana

Ah, what an adventure I already had this morning! Before I tell y'all about it, let me backtrack about 48 hours to Shabbos. First, el Jeffe gave me a ride to Jerusalem and we got in with 5 minutes to spare! Impressive, considering there was a huge accident right outside the city. An Egged bus had a tire blown out and the engine was smoking when we finally past all the rubberneckers who were holding up the show. Shabbos itself was really great, it was nice to see Buggy after not seeing him the entire week! His Mom broke out the family photos and we spent a long time on Friday night looking at pics of Buggy when he was little, at the family ski vacation, with his grandparents as his brother's wedding, and loads of army pics. Shabbos day was really relaxing too, it was just Buggy's family over for lunch and the meals were extremely entertaining. After a long Shabbos nap, it was time for me to go back to Tel Aviv and leave Buggy to study for his big exam this morning.

So, last night, as Buggy sat in his Uncle's office and studied for his exam, I decided to be a good fiance and watch the Israel vs. England soccer match. I promised to call him with any interesting action or goals, as he was too busy to watch or listen to the game. Fortunately for him, he didn't miss anything. That was probably the most boring sporting event I've ever watched, and people, I've sat through some pretty boring sporting events! The game ended 90 excrutiating minutes later in a 0-0 tie.

In the meantime, I'm a woman so I can multitask, I created a wedding website. I had a free one on the weddingchannel website but it was very limiting and no too nice. So, I went to Wedding Tracker and created our site. I spent the evening putting up photos, updating the wedding party, writing up some witting information about how we met, and loading the registries. By the time I was finished, I was just in time to wish Buggy good night and good luck, before he turned in for the evening.

This morning started off with a bang, well actually, a ring. The Mei Eden guys were here, yet again, trying to deliver some more water. Now, I appreciate that they are very vigilant with my water delivery, but they delivered 2 bottles 2 weeks ago and I haven't even started those. So, Itai called because they were outside the apartment door and ringing his bell and asked if I wanted to open up for the guys. I said I would because I wanted to return the empty bottles, and get them out of my apartment before Pesach.

After the Mei Eden guys left, I hopped into the shower, got dressed and called Lana about going to the Herzliya mall. We went to the 7 Stars Mall in Herzliya because I wanted to check out the Domo store and Lana's hard drive crashed. She went back to the Bug store to see if a technician could read what was on her harddrive and try to recovery some of that data (sadly, they weren't able to).

So, we get into a cab and the driver is listening to some Mordecai Ben David tunes and he's totally rockin the kippa. We asked for the moneh (meter) and he insisted on charging us a flat fee of 80 shekel. Since we have never been to this mall before, we didn't want to just go with what he said, and told him we'd prefer the meter. He said his meter wasn't working, so we got out of the cab and got into another one. This guy spoke English and had no problem with the meter.

Guess what - the entire ride was 43 shekel! Good thing we took the metered cab, what a ripoff!

The mall was a bit smaller than I expected, but they had some decent shops and everyone was selling stuff for Pesach! Domo was absolutely incredible! It was vast, had plenty of selection, and they had a ton of grills and appliances! After Pesach, I think Buggy and I are going to have to go back there to register for some wedding stuff.

Lana and I were done by 11:15 (we left at 9:45) and it took us three different tries to get a cab that would use a meter. He dropped us off on the corner of Arlozorov and Dizengof and Lana went home to study for an exam and I went to the AM PM to pick up some food for lunch. After getting back and doing some more wedding errands, I changed and went to change some money, hit the fruit and vegetable stand and put in my tablecloth to the cleaners.

The rest of my night is going to be pretty quiet, which is going to be good. I've saved all of my homework for tomorrow, and that means reading 3 short stories with commentary and also catching up on some Dubliner's stories.

4 days until I'm back in New York! I can't wait to see the family!